Why bottle it all up, inside,
When you can let your emotions be your guide,
When you can choose how (art, music, poetry, dance, theatre, cinema and so much more), to bring it all out,
Not just scream, weep, laugh or shout,
Where, you can stagger, yet, find your own pace,
Paint your canvas red, if it’d bring you solace,
Why bottle it all up inside,
When there’s so much in the world to confide!
The sweet nothings, the banter,
The endless chitter-chatter,
The scent of your presence,
The emotions that run so dense,
They seem so far away, so distant,
Come a little closer, it’s time to set right the invisible dent!
Yesterday, I yet again realised how sensitive I am, to words, to emotions, to situations, to people. To people who I think belong to me. It was just another normal conversation, but the over-thinking brain in me found something to worry about, as usual.
After a series of texts and calls and conversations, and both of us became of wary ( I, of me, my friend, of me as well. What else?) I understood it was time to let go. To let go of the extremely fine thread of expectations I had. To let go of the hurt and the anger and the pain. To let go of the guilt and the misery and the doubt.
I realised I can’t go about carrying a “Handle With Care” sign in this world, when I am the odd one out. Every emotion has to be mutual. I mean, it’s okay to sometimes take the first step when there are signs of reciprocation from the other end. But otherwise, there are extremely few occasions when the gesture is appreciated. And understood. And returned. Because, most of the time there is only turbulence, disappointment, awkwardness and emptiness.
I find it easier to bring down my expectations than face the disappointment of them not being fulfilled. But now I’ll have to find ways to become less sensitive, because a) It sometimes become too much for people around me to handle, b) I don’t seem to be able to appreciate the lack of it in some, c) And sometimes it leaves a bad taste in people that it brings an emptiness in the equation I share with people – the pain of which I don’t seem to be able to handle.
Thank God for blogging though, I can pour out anything I’d want to express without any filter. And share my views without having to feel mortified about it.
I don’t need a label,
My story ain’t a fable,
My emotions need no name,
They ain’t something to tame,
I don’t think when I express,
Because, I don’t express to impress!
Never be desperate – What’s meant to be yours, will eventually find you!
Hasty to vanquish my “Monday Blues”, I was playing around on the internet looking for something fun to do. And I hit on Cupick and Zazzle to put my incompetent brains to work.
I tried my hand at using my poetry for creating postcard/posters or artwork basically, and have put them up on sale. They’ll make ideal gifts for all occasions, because, poetry is often the best language to express your emotions.
Do have a look and share some love.
My artwork can be accessed below
You know what’s in demand these days? This. People skills. To be able to get along with people, anytime, anywhere. I wouldn’t call that “handling”, “dealing”, or “managing” people. I’d rather call it “getting along”. It’s a talent, an amazing one to be able to easily get along with people of all sorts, masking your irritation, your anger, your worries from them. To be able to play along, no matter what. To not withdraw yourself inwards and go all quiet if you’re not pleased. I wish I could do all this.
I wish I could mask my hatred, my love, my anger, my pain, my disappointment, my irritation, from my face, from people. I wish I could feign it all.