A few days ago, an elderly family friend had dropped by at our place to pay a visit to our family. He is pretty close to all of us, we like the rapport we share with him, plus the gifts he brings us everytime he visits. This visit, when my turn came, I composedly went and extended my ‘right’ hand to receive the gift. He swiftly looked at my parents, grinned at them appreciatively and gave me my gift. I politely thanked him, grimaced at no one in particular and went back to my room.
I was born left-handed. Trained and forced to become right-handed. So, impulsively and instinctively I reach out for everything with my left hand first. It isn’t in my ability to change it. And honestly speaking I wouldn’t want to, also. Although I now write and eat with my right hand, it’s certainly not possible for me or for any of us to survive with ease, without our left hands. But wait, some people find it easier to consider it a sign of disrespect without proper logic in place, than looking into how much discomfort the individual has to go through just for the sake of pleasing the society.
And talking of pleasing the society.. (which is next to impossible – unless you find it convenient to nod to every demand it makes – committing suicide seems to be an easier option for many these days) Yesterday morning, I met a friend’s mother. After the courtesy greetings and enquiring about what I’m doing for a living, she came down to the question she was itching to ask me – when I’m getting married – I’m amazed at how this question manages to put me off everytime someone asks me. I smiled at her, and explained at length about my views on independence and how I planned to lead my life. She looked startled when I was done and scuttled off even without a good bye. News about my “radical” and ” unreasonable” thought-process reached my mother’s ears who obviously told me off for the same.
Well, according to the society – atleast that’s what we are told from childhood – it’s radical and unreasonable when a woman wants to be independent – in literal terms and otherwise too, when she likes to decide for herself on how she’d like to live her life or when she wishes to be financially stable on her own income – for the whole of her life.
But what I find even more strange is, the society only yaps and keeps yapping all our lives, no matter what we say or do. It doesn’t give a damn if something goes wrong while following the rulebook it has charted out, for each of us, for every single stage of our lives.
And the rulebook keeps changing as per it’s comfort – the society doesn’t bother to check with us, if we are okay with what it calls it’s norms.
But not anymore. Let’s understand that we are answerable to no one else, but ourselves; We need to be honest enough to answer our conscience, and keep it clear – there’s nothing else that’ll give us a good night’s sleep. We needn’t be repenting in our ripe sixties or late seventies for not having done something we badly wanted to, just because the society wouldn’t let us. As long as we have our moral values intact, as long as we know what we are doing is right, and as long as it wouldn’t harm anyone in the process – intentionally or otherwise; nothing should stop us from achieving what we want to.
It’s high time we step out with courage and create. It’s time we explore and enjoy. It’s time we think. It’s time we have an opinion and express it. It’s time we try – and succeed in every possible expedition we can ever think of. It’s time we give a last ditch shot at everything we thought was impossible and find out it’s working, as well. It’s time we live and relish life like it’s meant to be. It’s time we don’t let the society – which comprises of you, me, the handful of people we ‘thought’ we knew; stop us from living our lives the way we want to. It’s time we stop blaming the society for our incompetencies and insecurities, and for all things that go haywire.
It’s time WE took charge of OUR lives.
P.S. I write more often about me and what I observe around me. Not because I’m vain, or my life is happening – but because I can relate absolutely to what I write. So I can vent, celebrate and cry with ease 😛